Where is that Control?

I looked for it everywhere...in the drawer near the TV, in the cushions, underneath the couch.  Did I take it with me to the bathroom?  Did the cats find a way to drag it off?

I've searched for it everywhere, and still haven't found that control.

Glasses?  Got 'em.  Car keys?  Right where I left them.  Wallet, check.  TV remote, check...

No control.

I've been looking for a long time now, too--ever since I can remember.  Back in school I looked for it when kids would get mean and say terrible things; I looked for the control to make them stop, to make them take it all back.  At home I tried to find the control so I could make my dad stop getting so angry.  I looked in the mirror to see if the control was there to make me feel less awkward, less afraid.  I tried to find the control so that I would be more athletic, thinner.  I needed the control so that my hair would be less frizzy and would look more like the cool kids' hair.   I searched for the control that would make me like sports more and cooking less.  And I searched everywhere for the control so that I would be attracted to girls instead of boys.

I never found it.

I have found one thing, though, in my search for that control.  I've found that life is so much better when I stop looking for it.

And now I wonder, sometimes, if maybe the world wouldn't be a better place if we'd all stop looking, and just start loving.

I once was lost but now am found.

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(c) 2014, Stephen Fiechter