A Balancing Act

Most mornings I try to set aside a little time to do some simple Yoga stretches.  The practice helps me wake up my body and increases my focus, flexibility, and energy level throughout the day.  (Here's a shameless plug for my friend Max at Mt. Olive in Santa Monica...check out their website, www.mtolivelutheranchurch.org, and join one of his classes if you're in the area...you'll be glad you did!).

One of the Yoga poses I like to do is called a tree pose:  while looking straight ahead and maintaining focus, one foot is lifted to the inside of the other leg.  The pose is held as long as possible.  Now you have to understand, I've never been a very coordinated type, so it's been a good thing, finding a practice that helps me increase my balance and ability to focus.  

I've gotten pretty good at it, too, I'm proud to say.  But this morning I noticed something--something really important.  While attempting that tree pose a thought came to mind: I pictured others watching me, and I lost my balance.  A second attempt and the same thing happened.  No one was watching (well, except maybe the cat). It was only the THOUGHT of someone watching that threw me off kilter.

Hmmmm....think about THAT!  The mere idea of an audience can create an imbalance in our lives.

There are many times in life when the observations of others can help us get back on track.  We need community--each other--to remind us of what's important and steer us away from danger toward safety and prosperity.   On the other hand, being too focused on those who may or may not be watching us can be a dangerous source of imbalance in our lives.  

All of which reminds me of that helpful saying, 

"What other people think of me is none of my business."

It's most certainly true--especially if they aren't thinking of me at all!

Wishing you all a well-balanced week!  If you enjoy reading these, please feel free to share them with others!  You'll find this post, as well as past blog posts at www.realacorns.blogspot.com.

(c) 2014, Stephen Fiechter

Where is that Control?

I looked for it everywhere...in the drawer near the TV, in the cushions, underneath the couch.  Did I take it with me to the bathroom?  Did the cats find a way to drag it off?

I've searched for it everywhere, and still haven't found that control.

Glasses?  Got 'em.  Car keys?  Right where I left them.  Wallet, check.  TV remote, check...

No control.

I've been looking for a long time now, too--ever since I can remember.  Back in school I looked for it when kids would get mean and say terrible things; I looked for the control to make them stop, to make them take it all back.  At home I tried to find the control so I could make my dad stop getting so angry.  I looked in the mirror to see if the control was there to make me feel less awkward, less afraid.  I tried to find the control so that I would be more athletic, thinner.  I needed the control so that my hair would be less frizzy and would look more like the cool kids' hair.   I searched for the control that would make me like sports more and cooking less.  And I searched everywhere for the control so that I would be attracted to girls instead of boys.

I never found it.

I have found one thing, though, in my search for that control.  I've found that life is so much better when I stop looking for it.

And now I wonder, sometimes, if maybe the world wouldn't be a better place if we'd all stop looking, and just start loving.

I once was lost but now am found.

So glad if you enjoy reading...please feel free to share.  Subscribe and check out previous posts at www.realacorns.blogspot.com.  

(c) 2014, Stephen Fiechter

Hot Stuff!

As I write this, many on the West Coast of the U.S. are experiencing extreme heat.  And it's not a so-called "dry heat" either...it's accompanied by a monsoon flow, don't ya know.  

Think hot and sticky.

I'm reminded, though, that it could be worse.  Even as we are baking in the heat and in the midst of a serious drought, it could be much worse.  For many in this world there is no shelter available.  For many in this world there is no choice but to be subjected to the horrors of diseases like Ebola and malaria.  Many have no clean water to drink, no food to eat, no clothes to wear, no roof over their heads.  And many of these are right here in our own back yard.

Which, in this heat, makes me wonder why anyone would worry about a place called hell while failing to see that it could all be avoided if we could just figure out how to share.  You see, every nickel in the bank of a wealthy person in the developed world (and that's most of us, frankly) is a nickel that could be used to alleviate the suffering of others.  Every vote to maintain the status quo, no matter how comfortable it may be for us, is a vote to starve the life out of someone in need.  That's the bottom line in a world of limited resources.  If some have, others do not.

Change is in order...the change in our pockets, and a change in perspective too.  It may not be popular with those of us who have grown quite comfortable in our air-conditioned homes with pretty green lawns, but who ever said doing the right thing was about being comfortable?  

Now I know that many who read this are generous folks, and to you I say "thank you."  And many who will see this don't have a lot of spare change rattling around.  To you I say, "God bless you."  As for the rest of us, maybe it's time to consider a little redistribution of our thinking, and of our love.

Be generous.  It's good for you, too.

So glad if you enjoy reading...please feel free to share.  Subscribe and check out previous posts at www.realacorns.blogspot.com.  

And be sure to drink plenty of water!  It's hot out there!

(c) 2014, Stephen Fiechter

 

What are You Building?

How could anyone be naive when it comes to human behavior?  People are capable of doing some pretty rotten things, and we all know it.  Just read the papers, check the internet, watch TV.  For that matter, think about your own life.  You've been the victim of insensitivity more than a few times, right? 

You've been on the giving end of insensitivity, too.  C'mon now, you can admit it.  Haven't you?  Haven't we all?

Today I was reminded of something I learned a long time ago--that putting a positive spin on people's intentions (that is, assuming they mean us well) is a good practice for more than just one good reason.  First, it sets me free from negative thinking.  My day gets so much better when I assume the best rather than expect the worst.  Second, it sets others free, too.  Haven't you noticed that people generally tend to live up to your expectations?  So why, then, would you want to set the bar so low?

Does that mean you won't ever be disappointed?  No.  Does it mean that others always want what's best for you?  No.  But isn't it better to experience a momentary disappointment in an otherwise good day, than to live in constant dread of what someone else might do so that you're never disappointed again?

All of which makes me wonder.  When I walk around bracing myself against things that may or may not ever even happen, when I set a low bar for the behavior of others and assume their insensitivies are aimed directly at me, am I not walling myself off from a better life, as well as depriving others of the opportunity to improve?

So the next time someone cuts me off in traffic or throws some trash on my lawn...the next time someone disregards my feelings or says something nasty to me, even if I know better, I'll assume they meant me no harm and I will wish them well.  Maybe if I assume the good, it will one day become reality.

Likewise I'll hope that the next time I'm careless in word or deed, that those who are the victims of my insensitivity will give me the same benefit of the doubt.  

It's the least I can do.  How about you?

"Put the best construction on everything..."

Wishing you all constructive week!  If you enjoy reading these, please feel free to share them with others!  You'll find this post, as well as past blog posts at www.realacorns.blogspot.com.

(c) 2014, Stephen Fiechter

Just Listen to those Hypocrites!

More and more we live in fear that the places we once thought were safe--our churches, our schools, our movie theaters, our homes--are not safe anymore.  So not too long ago I re-tweeted a video of a string of celebrities calling on the public to take some kind of action and make a positive change in society in order to curtail the escalating gun violence that has invaded every corner of our lives.  Now, whether or not you agree with the assertion that it's too easy to purchase and carry around weapons that can wipe out a classroom of kindergarteners faster than you can say "See Dick and Jane run!", you can't blame folks who have a platform (for whatever reason) for using it to express their opinions.

But apparently you can.  Someone commented on how the celebrities in that video were all hypocrites, which I presume means that we don't need to bother listening to anything they have to say.  Now that got me thinking: if I don't have to take seriously the opinions of anyone I judge to be hypocritical, that narrows the field!  I don't have to listen to anyone in my family, because over the years I've seen them do things that contradict what they say they believe.  I don't have to listen to any of my co-workers or bosses at work, because they don't always follow through on their stated goals.  Politicians?  Forget it!  And I sure don't have to listen to anyone at church, because heaven knows there's a lot more preachin' than there is practicin' going on there!

Then again, if I only ever listen to people who never do things that contradict what they say, I'd never listen to anyone--not even myself.  As it turns out, saying one thing and doing another is a universal practice.  You might even say it comes with being human.

So maybe what we're really doing, when we turn down those voices we judge to be hypocritical, is creating an excuse not to listen.  And maybe it would be better to simply own up to our own fear of facing the challenges of this world together, which at times seem insurmountable, rather than refusing to become a part of the solution and blaming others for our own choices.

See, just because someone is a hypocrite doesn't mean they don't have anything important to say.

"....remove the log from your own eye..."